keepersouha: (mrgh 2)
Samasu, Souha ([personal profile] keepersouha) wrote2010-04-24 12:33 pm
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... I don't really like looking at the notes that are left around, but...

Why does one of them warn of me being kidnapped in the near future?

Re: [Private to Souha]

[identity profile] keepersouha.livejournal.com 2010-04-25 04:40 am (UTC)(link)
Oh, no, that was pretty much what happened.

They got angry at me in our own mind, so you made them unable to get consistently angry at me past vague annoyance.

Re: [Private to Souha]

[identity profile] keepersouha.livejournal.com 2010-04-25 04:40 am (UTC)(link)
... Wait, what?

Re: [Private to Souha]

[identity profile] keepersouha.livejournal.com 2010-04-25 04:42 am (UTC)(link)
Of course, even vague annoyance can blossom~

Re: [Private to Souha]

[identity profile] keepersouha.livejournal.com 2010-04-25 04:49 am (UTC)(link)
What are they talking about.

Re: [Private to Souha]

[identity profile] thefifthmonarch.livejournal.com 2010-04-25 05:00 am (UTC)(link)
You were so emotionally high-strung and unstable that if I hadn't tweaked a few things, you'd be one mind right now, and it wouldn't be you, they'd be "Souha".

Re: [Private to Souha]

[identity profile] keepersouha.livejournal.com 2010-04-25 05:04 am (UTC)(link)
... Nice to see that my mental state matches what I expected anyway.

Re: [Private to Souha]

[identity profile] thefifthmonarch.livejournal.com 2010-04-25 05:06 am (UTC)(link)
What, you'd of rather died?

Re: [Private to Souha]

[identity profile] keepersouha.livejournal.com 2010-04-25 05:11 am (UTC)(link)
It's already a given by anyone else that I'm going to. I'm a fake, worthless, and always angry for "no good reason", so why try to hide that anyone considers that to be the route anyway?

Re: [Private to Souha]

[identity profile] thefifthmonarch.livejournal.com 2010-04-25 05:12 am (UTC)(link)
Because I love you. And I'd be sad if you died.

Re: [Private to Souha]

[identity profile] keepersouha.livejournal.com 2010-04-25 05:16 am (UTC)(link)
... Then why don't you actually show that for once instead of trying to brush my own concerns off like they're nothing.

Re: [Private to Souha]

[identity profile] thefifthmonarch.livejournal.com 2010-04-25 05:21 am (UTC)(link)
Because you're so worried on minutia, dear. Most of your concerns seem... frivolous to someone like me. Though, what are your concerns, in a nicely organized list?

Re: [Private to Souha]

[identity profile] keepersouha.livejournal.com 2010-04-25 05:32 am (UTC)(link)
I'm concerned that I'm going to end up vanishing because they're more adjusted.

I'm concerned and believe that no will care if that happens.

I'm concerned that they seem to purposely to annoy me or frustrate me, and that people approve of this, even when they try and claim that they aren't fond of them.

I'm concerned they're going to end up getting me killed, because of their own curiosity and flippant attitude.

I'm concerned that even if a situation happened where they'd be "taught a lesson", they'd just shove me out into the front instead for me to take instead.

I'm concerned that even if I try to stop focusing on this it will end up biting back at me like the last times I tried to let go of something.

I keep thinking back to how much easier it was when it was just me and the mask, but instead I have to accept that he's dead because of me and replaced by someone who harasses me indirectly, and nothing but a fraud and fake of him would ever form anymore even if I tried to focus on them instead.

Re: [Private to Souha]

[identity profile] thefifthmonarch.livejournal.com 2010-04-25 05:44 am (UTC)(link)
1. They're more adjusted because they don't passive aggressively avoid fixing their own problems like you, and are willing to put in effort into doing things. Even if it is a bit sadistic.

2. I will.

3. Their actions seem more calm and less agitated. People are more willing to deal with someone calm than someone pissy. You shouldn't be having a period.

4. Have they done anything close enough to give this belief backing?

5. I can fix that.

6. Which was?

7. Things change and you mature. Maybe you decided subconsciously it was time to grow up and to stop having things so easily?

Re: [Private to Souha]

[identity profile] keepersouha.livejournal.com 2010-04-25 06:03 am (UTC)(link)
1. Since when have they ever actually put in effort to fix our problems?

2. Why is it so hard to believe, then?

3. So because their actions are more "calm", they're free to harass me and thus cause me to act agitated in the first place?

4. Multiple times, I've woken up in the middle of the city, completely lost, and half of the time, someone would end up chasing me down for something I don't remember doing. So yes they've done plenty to give this belief backing.

5. How?

6. The two biggest points were when I first tried to get over my anger at Jouyoku, Ai. She ended up instead trying to seduce me and have sex with me, causing me to lose Theresa.

And then later on when I tried to move on from that fact, Theresa shows up through the door of one of my more trustworthy friend's house, and completely despises me and would probably be more than willing to freeze me to death.

7. If it did, then I hate my mind more than anything else for killing him.

Re: [Private to Souha]

[identity profile] thefifthmonarch.livejournal.com 2010-04-25 06:20 am (UTC)(link)
1. They don't have insane canon law they follow.

2. Because you've deluded yourself into thinking everyone hates you.

3. People don't like dealing with grumpy people. It avoids pain, on a genetic and historic level.

4. Have you ever asked them why?

5. I'm me. That should give an idea.

6. Oh joy. You people really do enjoy your asinine proof by example fallacies.

Hasn't she always been better about guys?

7. Not your mind. You. You chose to kill them.

Re: [Private to Souha]

[identity profile] keepersouha.livejournal.com 2010-04-25 06:29 am (UTC)(link)
1. ... What?

2. Well no one tends to show otherwise, except for Sekuta, and even he acts unsatisfied with me, too. ... at least, whenever I'm a guy.

3. I'd rather they at least try to make it so I'm not grumpy all the time.

4. I've attempted. The answer I've gotten was "because it was fun."

5. ... mrgh...

6. They're just the two biggest points.

I was actually helping that before the first big thing happened. And then she was told off by the female one.

7. I'd never choose to kill them myself-- besides, it's not like I have any control over who stays and who doesn't. I'm as completely fake as the rest of them.

Re: [Private to Souha]

[identity profile] thefifthmonarch.livejournal.com 2010-04-25 06:49 am (UTC)(link)
1. Most of your problems are due to inane arbitrary rules you have.

2. Because you're grumpy.

3. So don't, and this is the best way I can put it, whine all the time. Keep your problems to yourself on occasion. If you don't seem miserable every waking moment whenever you talk, people would be more interested in talking to you. For all I know, you could end up with a girl under each arm.

4. ... Sounds like me.

5. Your choice if you enjoy suffering so much.

6. ... Sounds utterly delightful and pleasant and charming.

7. Never call yourself fake. That's insinuating I'm just Gren Maju Da Eiza pretending to be Wakahisa Noriko, and not the other way around.

Re: [Private to Souha]

[identity profile] keepersouha.livejournal.com 2010-04-25 07:05 am (UTC)(link)
1. I don't think this particular point is due to my arbitrary rules.

2. So it's a loop.

3. I'd probably end up setting the city on fire if I kept these problems to myself.

And I already happen to have someone if i I need to remind you I don't need a "girl under each arm".

4. Which is probably why you like them, you realize. But it's not all that good when they're a part of your head.

5. I don't want to keep suffering. That's the last thing I ever want.

6. Truly, yes.

7. ... But that's what Erland said I was. Fine, I won't. I'm sorry. But I still don't have any more of a choice than they do.

Re: [Private to Souha]

[identity profile] thefifthmonarch.livejournal.com 2010-04-25 07:16 am (UTC)(link)
2. And you have to break the loop because other people won't do it for you.

3. Then enjoy people not talking to you. And I was joking. My point is your personal relationships would be less sour if you seemed less sour. People might actually listen to you.

But seriously, every post you make should not be complaining.

4. Why? I'm a part of my head and I like me.

5. And I could help ending it.

7. He's wrong then, because if he's right, I'm not Noriko and then I have to kill you all and bomb God.

Re: [Private to Souha]

[identity profile] keepersouha.livejournal.com 2010-04-25 07:21 am (UTC)(link)
2. Like he'll stop a loop-- it's like a tiny little niche he's fixed himself into that he finds pointless to get out of.

3. But what happens when he ends up getting sour in the course of someone trying to listen to him? Then no one would listen to him regardless-- such a poor thing, really.

4. Because he doesn't know how to enjoy himself or the feeling of being able to see new places or see new reactions.

5. And how would you end it, then?

7. And if he's wrong, then he'll end up trying to fix it anyway. He's already disturbing me just slightly.

Re: [Private to Souha]

[identity profile] thefifthmonarch.livejournal.com 2010-04-25 07:27 am (UTC)(link)
2. Then I get involved.

3. Then that's something he needs to work on.

4. ... Hrm.

5. Use your brains.

7. How?

Re: [Private to Souha]

[identity profile] keepersouha.livejournal.com 2010-04-25 07:31 am (UTC)(link)
2. You can try, I guess.

3. Like a hammer to a solid rock, of course.

4. At least, that's what I think it is~

5. It leads to terrifying results.

7. Oh, I just told him that he's the reason I even exist and he went creepy-icon on me. Nothing big.

Re: [Private to Souha]

[identity profile] thefifthmonarch.livejournal.com 2010-04-25 08:01 am (UTC)(link)
2. I will.

3. That's why you bring in TNT.

4. Proof?

5. That's a good start.

7. Hmph.

Re: [Private to Souha]

[identity profile] keepersouha.livejournal.com 2010-04-25 08:04 am (UTC)(link)
4. I think that they're just "new experience", but he thinks of them as a troublesome annoyance and risk-- though really, he should try to keep away from stores and the sort if he thinks that someone is going to chase him down for what I may or may not have said about their tastes.

5. I'm half-intrigued though.

7. That's just how it is~